In the Summer of 1990 at a friend’s house in Boulder, Colorado, we drank mushroom tea. We started to come down and my friend, Puppy Boy said, “Let’s make some more mushroom tea.”

I said that sounds great and my girlfriend at the time said no. We’re coming down but I ignored her and drank another cup. I then became extremely high again and started to freak out. I told my girlfriend I was freaking out and she laughed and said, “I can’t do anything for you. I told you to not drink anymore.”

So I went outside and sat on the cement steps of the basement apartment. The mushroom tea continued to kick in and I kept thinking, why did I drink the extra cup? I’m about to have a completely bad trip. At this moment a wind picked up across the street and started moving towards me. A rustling of leaves filled the air and being on mushrooms I stared at the wind coming towards me.

I noticed that there was a strange spiral that seemed to come from one of the trees; thicker at the base and narrower at the top, about three feet tall. I didn’t take my eyes off of it. The wind finally engulfed me and so did the spiral. And as it spiraled around me, I instantly felt absolute peace and calm. My body no longer felt any pain or tension and it was also a very distinct feminine entity like a mother hugging you.

The wind kept going and the spiral went with it. And as it left I realized I was no longer tripping that hard and felt completely relaxed. And at that moment I thought, did I just have some cliche hippie experience with Mother Nature? I groaned and went back into the basement happy I wasn’t freaking out anymore and promptly forgot about it.

The Spring or Summer of 1997 in Portland, Oregon at my old girlfriend’s house, I was reading a book about Wesley Allen Dodd. It was a beautiful day. When Wesley Allen Dodd stabbed the two boys in the park I was very excited and thought, “You go, Wesley Allen Dodd and do your thing.”

I then put the book down, drank some coffee and looked out the second story window of my apartment and noticed in the blue sky outside the window a spiral, thick at the base, narrow at the top, spiraling towards the window. I wasn’t on mushroom tea but completely sober and awake from delicious coffee.

I stared at the spiral, wondering if I was actually seeing it. It came closer to the window and I wondered what was going to happen. And then the spiral slowly came through the window. The spiral was as if molecules were slightly distorted. It wasn’t a color. It was a shape and was moving. It was a slight distortion of the air.

At that moment it reminded me of the time I freaked out on mushroom tea in Boulder, Colorado and had the Mother Nature trip. So I thought, oh, the last time this happened it spiraled around me and I had felt absolute bliss. The spiral spiraled around me and instead of feeling absolute bliss I felt absolute panic in the purest sense of the word.

And this spiral imparted to me that I had gone too far with what I was reading. That it wasn’t a healthy interest in the dark side of human nature but a ghastly distorted one. It was so incredibly intense I sat there for a few moments. And then I looked in the corner where I had a bunch of wonderful pictures of horrible things hanging up with my JonBenet Ramsey candy cane and her golden shovel from the sandbox that a friend from Colorado sent me and I thought, so all of a sudden I’m not supposed to like this stuff anymore? This is wrong?

And then a very clear voice said as I stared at my alter, “This is the cornerstone that you build upon.”

I shook my head and the voice said again, “This is the cornerstone that you build upon.”

At that moment I had a vision of a cornerstone and taking this stuff and transforming it from darkness into light. And then I groaned because I didn’t like that idea at all. It reminded me of people who would put serial killers and pictures of concentration camps on their album covers and say this is our way of showing these things are bad which always annoyed me. Just admit you like this stuff. It’s healthy and interesting and part of the Reality TV Scene.

And then life went on. A few months later I started having dreams that I later realized were alchemical in nature even though I’d never had any interest in alchemy. Also, some of the dreams were Kundalini in nature. Another thing I had no interest in.

I write this because I think a lot of people have these strange, magical moments and also because as I’ve gotten more into Kundalini Yoga in the past seven years I’ve become more interested in spirals and the Divine Feminine. Or if you don’t like the term Divine Feminine, you can substitute Peggy Olson.

When I went to JonBenet Ramsey’s house in 1999 with my old lady, Kaleidoscope, I took back three pinecones from her house as keepsakes. Over the years as I’ve become more interested in Kundalini Yoga I realized how perfect it all was. The yellow shovel represents the sacrum, where the root chakra lies. The candy cane is the danda staff, red and white, Ida and Pingala, Sun and Moon. Three pine cones, the pineal gland and the Third Eye, which I had no interest in, in 1999.

But that’s the way the Pft! looks at things. Every ugly Brown Goblin activity has a silver factory lining. The Great Work is all around us. JonBenet Ramsey is the present at the base of the Tree of Life. She is Sleeping Beauty waiting for us to awaken her so she can awaken us. You just have to unwrap that bow.

But that’s only if you believe that God made a TV show called The Partridge Family that would later become a religion that the God Freaks would watch obsessively on CBS.

I will take this Pft! opportunity to quote the old saying,



JBR Venus symbol 1970 by Whale Song Partridge
The Diary of Shaun Partridge 1972

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