{"id":1681,"date":"2017-03-10T00:01:16","date_gmt":"2017-03-10T00:01:16","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.thepartridgefamilytemple.org\/albuquerque\/?p=1681"},"modified":"2017-03-11T06:04:45","modified_gmt":"2017-03-11T06:04:45","slug":"all-is-un","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/www.thepartridgefamilytemple.org\/albuquerque\/2017\/03\/10\/all-is-un\/","title":{"rendered":"Children of the Un"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"\"\u201cNice hickeys\u201d, Danny says out loud.<\/span><\/strong><\/p>\n

Laurie drops her buttered carrots to her plate and kicks Danny under the table. Tracy says, \u201cWhat\u2019s a hick, Danny?\u201d<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

Danny laughs, \u201cNot hick. Hickey!\u201d<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

Laurie starts to get up to leave the dinner table and Shirley says, \u201cDanny! Pipe down. And Laurie, you\u2019re not leaving this table until you finish your carrot casserole.\u201d<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cBut what\u2019s a hick hickey, Mommy?\u201d Tracy asks again.<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

Christopher puts his milk down and says, \u201cI like cowboy movies.\u201d<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

Shirley smiles, smoothes out the place setting and says, \u201cA hickey is when a boy or a girl sucks on your neck because they are sexually excited and at the same time frustrated. Also, because humans are animals and we live in the animal kingdom, it\u2019s a way of marking your mate or property.<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

Shirley looks concerned that her eldest son Keith is not at the table. \u201cI wish your brother was here right now because he knows all about hickeys but he\u2019s on a date with Suzanne.\u201d<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

She turns to her eldest daughter, \u201cLaurie honey, there\u2019s nothing to be ashamed of. Once upon a time even your mom had a hickey. And let me tell you, church socials that summer were very uncomfortable.\u201d<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

Laurie smiles and starts to pick up her fork again to continue eating when Danny bursts out, \u201cWas it Snake who gave you the hickeys or were you passed around a biker club for initiation?\u201d<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

Danny has a sly, wicked look as he says this. Shirley looks puzzled and says, \u201cBut Snake\u2019s on a run this summer. He hasn\u2019t been in town for at least a month. Do you have a new steady, Laurie?\u201d<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

Laurie looks uncomfortable and starts to fidget. Her face turns flushed with embarrassment and then Shirley realizes why Keith\u2019s not at the dinner table. Shirley thought it was odd that Keith had an urgent date to go on when they planned this family dinner a week ago. After all she made a special Spoon Candy dessert for everyone.<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

Danny sticks his tongue out with crazed-eyed excitement. Laurie starts to get up again but Shirley says very calmly, \u201cLaurie, please sit down. I have known this was going to happen for a long time. You\u2019re sexually active and so is Keith and apparently you\u2019re both sexually active together. And that\u2019s not a bad thing. In fact, I always hoped that one day, you and your brother would enjoy carnal knowledge.\u201d<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

Shirley puts her strawberry Libby\u2019s drink concoction on the table and continues, \u201cSoon Laurie, you and Keith will become one. That is the goal of all ape insects; to resemble you, Laurie and your goofball of a brother. But to resemble both of you as one. You will no longer be Laurie or Keith. You will be Albuquerque. The Land of Enchantment. Everyone is on that bus but not everyone is going to arrive at that destination.\u201d<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

Laurie bites her lip and says, \u201cSo what you\u2019re saying Mom is me and Keith didn\u2019t do anything wrong?\u201d<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

Shirley shakes her blonde golden head and says, \u201cNo, Laurie you did do something wrong.\u201d<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

Danny laughs and balls up his fists, his face exploding like a freckle furnace. Laurie puts her head down and mumbles, \u201cSorry, Mom.\u201d<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

Right then the door opens and Keith walks in. Shirley says, \u201cKeith, I\u2019m going to have to ground you and Laurie.\u201d<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

Keith throws his hands up and says, \u201cOh, man! What did I do this time?\u201d<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

Shirley laughs and says, \u201cIt\u2019s what you didn\u2019t do. Alright, you two. You\u2019re both grounded to my bedroom and you can\u2019t leave until you both no longer exist. Next time I see you two, you better be Un!\u201d<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

Christopher and Tracy laugh as Laurie starts to blush and Keith\u2019s beige slacks start to strain with godlike excitement.<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

UN FACT:\u00a0Ardhanarishvara is a nickname when Keith and Laurie\u00a0have become Un and the same.\u00a0<\/span><\/strong><\/p>\n

Un is the Law by Whale Song Partridge<\/strong><\/span>
\nNew Age teaching by The Partridge in the Pear Tree<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

\u201cNice hickeys\u201d, Danny says out loud. Laurie drops her buttered carrots to her plate and kicks Danny under the table. Tracy says, \u201cWhat\u2019s a hick, Danny?\u201d Danny laughs, \u201cNot hick. Hickey!\u201d Laurie starts to get up to leave the dinner table and Shirley says, \u201cDanny! Pipe down. And Laurie, you\u2019re not leaving this table until […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":true,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[36,5,53],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1681","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-albuquerque-affirmations","category-the-god-scene","category-un-yoga"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p2wBFt-r7","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.thepartridgefamilytemple.org\/albuquerque\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1681","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.thepartridgefamilytemple.org\/albuquerque\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.thepartridgefamilytemple.org\/albuquerque\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.thepartridgefamilytemple.org\/albuquerque\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.thepartridgefamilytemple.org\/albuquerque\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1681"}],"version-history":[{"count":6,"href":"http:\/\/www.thepartridgefamilytemple.org\/albuquerque\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1681\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1690,"href":"http:\/\/www.thepartridgefamilytemple.org\/albuquerque\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1681\/revisions\/1690"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.thepartridgefamilytemple.org\/albuquerque\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1681"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.thepartridgefamilytemple.org\/albuquerque\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1681"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.thepartridgefamilytemple.org\/albuquerque\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1681"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}